Lots of love

There is so much love in my being I want to spread it all over the universe. The universe is so full of love. My heart and the universe are mirrors of one another. How beautiful it is. Be part of the universe and be love.

September 2010

I haven't posted in forever. Didn't know what to post and then thought about it for a bit and came up with my pieces.

There are tattered pieces of paper that I often write on. Just something to quickly grab the moment the words comes to me and the burning need and desire to write them down before they're gone forever.

Generally, these papers can come from anywhere and I always attempt to use a nice crisp sheet of fresh paper, but mostly I find I write on tattered pieces of something from within one of my cars - usually from the glove compartment. I've just found some of them in my writing folder I've had for years. It's a Mead folder with a picture of a mystical unicorn and pegasus flying around colorful planets. My magical writings....

Here are some of my tattered pieces:

You know it's never as sad as it seems

Only the moment remains extreme

I see the people on the street

They walk around with nothing on their feet

So for you to say you're hurting from my actions that really remain

Burns my heart

from all his pain

Who the hell do you think you are?

You're not the only fool alive

Don't you get it?

My feelings have died.

Wow - and this was written on a Cigna Dental Options envelope that says, Options: Because no one dental plan is right for everyone. And it shows a yellow street sign with an arrow pointing to the right and the left...

Choices!!! Our choices are so very important to the future.

Then there is a purple piece of paper from a letter size legal pad with what appears to be coffee stains and a drawing from a child. Not sure which child though...but there is some red and blue with a little black crayon marks.

This one reads:

I sit and I ponder

my lifes worth-

I know I search to find beauty in everything

And I do

Still here I am contemplating

all that is and all that will be.

The back of the paper has some purple, yellow and brown crayon on it too.

And this is from a small mini notebook with the ripped paper at the top of the pages:

Although it's only hours

time goes by like years

You are here with me right now

in my heart and my soul

but not being able to touch you

is getting too much out of control

Just waiting for the pain to leave

and our lives to go on

Baby we know its real

you know that we can feel

so let them say what they will

And the next page:

Just hung up the phone from talking to you

wiped the wet feelings from my face

There you have it. Some of my very old tattered pieces of writing which were written in the moment and not at all edited since written. Thoughts of the past - in the moment. Those moments are forever gone...but at least I have the pieces of what is left to give you. Good or bad, right or wrong, they are mine and I can share.

Take whatcha want and leave the rest...but always remember to love. :-) Peace!

October 2009

How goofy and adorable are they?

Dates unknown...

Untitled I

The beauty of the day enraptures me
we are so blessed to be here.
Yet so many of us continue to destroy -
it remains a choice to be had.

I, too, am no angel or enchantress-
at least not all the time.
But there is something to be said about
what it is that we have here.

We are alive and control the outcome-
The masters of our own universe.
Seeing so much bloodshed,
and all the destruction in this world-
angers me and it makes me sad.

I suck in my nicotine and
put butter on my bread
Knowing the consequences-
and not paying no mind-
I couldn't even tell you why.

This self destruction spreads
like cancer in so many of us-
each with their own vice-
fighting their own inner war.

My heart is like a wildfire-
burning out of control.
In search of that necessary balance-
deep within my soul.

Untitled II

There are so many changes going on
all at once-
these changes in life-
they happen all the time.

Still I find myself wondering, what if?
Or pondering, what will be-
Only to find those questions maddening.

Life is.
And will always be.

Dr. Seuss - The Lorax

"UNLESS someone like you...cares a whole awful lot...nothing is going to get better...It's not."

1971

Look where we are now.

June 16th & My Only Hand...

It's the middle of June already...time continues to amaze me.

It is so very fleeting.

There is a wonderful link I want to share with all of you. It is so very important that we become aware of everything that is going on with our home...it's called the story of stuff.

http://www.storyofstuff.com/

Pretty amazing and cool and yet one of those things that makes you think...

Keep dreaming, keep thinking and loving!

Peace....

My Only Hand

Change has taken me by the hand
to search for what was lost.
The colours of my quilt are brighter now
and the texture more alive.

I still recall some faded pictures
that linger in my mind.
Within their own dimension,
another space in time.

And yet so close,
what once was-
Is just too far away
and within a blink, it is gone.

Day to day we grow and learn
to move ahead.
Guided through this maze alone-
Ending up alone.

So while on this inevitable journey
I play my only hand.
Keeping the tapestry balanced-
with diamonds, clubs, spades and hearts.

With eyes of fire and a flooded heart,
my feet remain planted deep within this earth.
Yet the winds of change continue to blow,
while I forever search for what was lost.

Decide what you want

And then make it happen.

That's the power inside us all. But sometimes we just let the surrounding static get in the way.

That's it.

It's worked for me more times than I can remember and for whatever reason I ignored it. Only to finally listen again. Never ever negate your inner bell!
It always - I repeat always ~ rings true.

So why do we self-sabotage sometimes? What is the purpose when this life is so short?

Kinda boggles my mind. Which brings me to another can of worms that I'm thinking about right now, but it's not positive so I won't go there. Only positive stuff...think positive...stay positive!

And within this timespace -- it kinda reminds me of some posey written on my birthday... 14 years ago - 11.3.82. Known as,

26th birthday

There are only
blurred visions left
of something
that was once
so clear

Deeply I so fear
that with each new day
such clarity will again
just fade away

Everything is a gamble
some monotonous charade
results that are different
in the end
remain the same

Death is inevitable
and life is but a dream
leaving me here
so hauntingly intrigued

That's it. Sharing with you - any of you - just because I want to. Take what you want and leave the rest...but please do it with love.

A little bit gypsy and a little bit witch - that's just me. PEACE.